Preparing for AIB? Here’s A Demo Test of AIB I failed

Read Also: AIB First Draft Season 2

Here you go,

1) Write a paragraph of a parody song called Every Bollywood sad song ever OR Every bollywood item song ever.

Rather than going with ‘OR’ option, I will prefer to go with ‘AND’ because I have a good song related to both.

Every Bollywood Sad Song Ever

Once upon a time, a few thousand sad songs ago, a guy suffered heavily from a breakup so……..he sang a sad, very sad song. It goes as…..(Sing in the Dhun of Song ‘Tanhaai’ of Dil Chahta Hai)

कॉमेडी हो या थ्रिलर हो घंटा फरक पड़ता हे

Sad song is a must. Indian audience wait for it,

yes it’s their lust.

हर lyrics कुछ केहता हे Only dark things of life

इसको जो गा लिया तो तुजे Ex की याद आई

सच्चाई सच्चाई

यही हे बॉलीवुड के sad songs की सच्चाई

 

A lil bit of emotions with a hint of a cry in the singer’s sigh,

Helping the Chutiya face of the hero who is shown high,

And, when the hero remembers his beloved,

She somehow appears as a mirage, soon disappeared,

Showing physics in a sentimental way, engineering re-appeared,

 

सच्चाई सच्चाई

यही हे बॉलीवुड के sad songs की सच्चाई

 

Every Bollywood Item Song Ever …..(Sing in the Dhun of Song ‘Afghan Jalebi’)

Starting में अंड़शंड कोरस  (Ya बाबा)

फिर item girl की expected entry  (Ya बाबा)

1 item और हज़ारो बन्दे   (Ya बाबा)

हज़ारो बन्दों में अपना एक हीरो लौंडा  (Ya बाबा)

और कुछ न मिले तो  songs का remix  (Ya बाबा)

घुसेड़ दो उसमे Sunny या Katrina  (Ya बाबा)

 

चलेगी चलेगी ये item number चलेगी

जैसे ये चलती आई है

भाई वाह भाई वाह भाई वाह

 

तेरे hips के अलावा Talent भी कभी दिखाना

भाई वाह भाई वाह भाई वाह

Director के आगे Producer चुगली करेगा

ये तेरी चुगली करेगा

 

चलेगी चलेगी ये item number चलेगी

जैसे ये चलती आई है

भाई वाह भाई वाह भाई वाह

5) Tell us 3 things you like about AIB.

  • AIB is direct about everything that’s true. It is a positive evolution in the comedy/parody/humor industry.
  • Wow. Mainly because of the ‘B’ word because it’s a routine word.
  • That ‘Extra’ the audience gets in every video because of the different permutations & combinations of Rohan, Tanmay, Ashish & Khamba.
  • On air with AIB. Jakkaas.

PS- AIB First Draft Program. It really helps aspiring writers.

4) Tell us 3 things you don’t like about AIB right now.

  • I want to see everything of AIB with parents. Oopps.
  • Why aren’t you making a web series? Still?
  • Kapil Sharma.

2) You have access to Sunny Leone and Vishwanathan Anand. Think of a sketch idea for each of them – one for Sunny and one for Anand. (Reference: Alia Bhatt Genius Of The Year) No need to write the sketch entirely. Explain the idea, beginning, middle and end of the sketch in less than 400 words. Avoid writing listicle type videos (5 friends you meet at a wedding types). If you have a reference to another sketch, feel free to paste the link.

Sunny Leone

Sketch Name – The Red Light Area

Idea: In this sketch, an unmarried Honey in her mid-40s (protagonist) is working in a short film where she is portrayed as a widow. She has to feel the lives of widow around her in the city. She frequently visits ‘Old Widow Home’ in the city. In the first half, Honey is portrayed a typical Indian girl. The idea is to show her as an ‘Abla Naari’. The second half shows the transformation of the girl.

The twist is that she wins an Oscar for this movie. Her life changes totally. She is deeply connected with the lives of the widow. She starts to visit the widow homes occasionally, again & again, smelling the air of it, feeling it.

Soon, she leaves the film industry and dives into the colorful but colorless life of it. The end will show her, sitting on the same widow home like a boss of the ‘Red light area’.

Beginning:

The first scene is on the cross road where Sunny Leone is waiting to turn the ‘Red Signal’ into ‘Green’. She goes into the flashback…

The press conference of the film promotion goes when she says, “

I have worked hard for this movie. I have poured myself completely. I still have some of their elements within me. I feel them.”

Middle: The film releases. It goes a hit. The movie is nominated for international film festivals and then Oscars. She wins it. She says she deserve it……..Tannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn. The transformation.

End: She drove it to her new home where she has lot of women under her supervision.

The last scene – A model in her mid-40s enters her room saying, “I am doing a short film and I need to know about your life.”

The sweet smile of Honey justifies the full circle.

Life’s Good when you pour the color into the colorless.

Vishwanathan Anand

Sketch Name: Slow Thinker of the year.

Idea: Everyone is aware about the intelligence of Mr.Anand, but there is one certain thing about his expertise is that Chess is a very ‘slow’ game. We will show the troubles he faces in the real life because of the wrong perception of people around him. But then, there is a U-turn in the story when he decides to do something about it. After all, he is the mastermind. He thinks of diverting his skill in the Chess. Yes. Fast Chess. Like, the game has to be completed within a limited duration of time. 20-20 Chess. 50-50 Chess. The boring game remains no boring as the ‘Nerds’ all around the world and geeks from across the earth started participating in the new form of chess.

He becomes the mentor of the ‘Fast is the new Slow’ trend of Chess.

Beginning: The fame all across the globe will be shown. He is a successful man. He is a happy man. He is receiving accolades. He is named ‘Brain-iac’ of the world. But….

Middle: The routine life starts to suck when he realize that everyone around him thinks ‘e thinks really slow. He is very slow, you know. Slow. Slow. Low. Law. Loolololo’. The people judge him saying, “आप chess खेलौना, sir. आप chess ही खेलौना , sir. Everywhere he goes, people say, “सर, आप बहोत slow सोचते हो.” He is frustrated of people’s comments and taunts. He thinks, “

मेरी ज़िन्दगी भी chess जैसी हो गई थी

कभी में राजा तो कभी पौन

कभी जीतेजी ऊँट की तरह बेबस और

कभी घोड़े की तरह लंगड़ा

कभी में वज़ीर और कभी में सिर्फ राजा का गुलाम

सब्जीवाले से लेके दूधवाले से लेके मेरा life insurance वाला, I am a ‘Slow Man’. I think I can be the next ‘Man’ after Antman.

End:

The Slow man, to get out of the image, revamps himself into the fast form of Chess. Fast Chess. The fast trend is widespread and he is no longer ‘Slow’.

The End could go good but when he’s in bed with his wife, ……He is good old slow…………..

3) One Plus mobiles wants to be integrated in a sketch. They want to communicate that their phones come with the best cameras. Think of a sketch for them (Take Fevent and Ola- Peeke Mat Chala as examples. The sketch should be insight driven, something that doesn’t feel like an ad necessarily, and the brand is integrated seamlessly. Don’t try and make the brand the hero – this is not a 30-second commercial. This is a Youtube video – so content first. Again, no need to write the sketch entirely. Explain the idea, beginning, middle and end of the sketch in less than 400 words.)

Idea: This sketch is about a middle-class family who is living their normal life, earning enough and children are happy with everything they get from their parents. One day, one of their plans to go to Shimla is suddenly canceled. But, the story doesn’t end on a sad note.

Beginning: The Rajasthani family is preparing for the 7-day vacation to Shimla. They are exciting about the weather, the snow and the nature. A father, mother, one daughter of 15 and a son of 6 are packing, talking, gossiping, smiling, laughing about the trip starting day after tomorrow. The shopping is done. Tickets are booked.

Middle: The crisis that the father feels in the office puts his job at risk. He suddenly cancels the vacation program. The family, at the dining table, doesn’t exchange a word. The father has no word to justify because eventually the job is important. The mother consoles the children but they are annoyed. It goes for a week. The father doesn’t feel good about it. He wants to see their family united and happy. The end is when the boy of 6 is sad of the program being canceled and looks at the neighbors going on their vacation.

End:

His father comes to him, trying to hug but the boy is still sad. The father then makes a sweet gesture to do it all right. With an already prepared snow garden in the backyard, helped by the mother, they start to photo shoot as if they are traveling in Shimla. The kids’, watching their mother and father, enjoying or pretending to laugh, go to them and starts posing. The family is happy at HOME.

“और कौन केहता हे के खुशियाँ पाना मुश्किल है?

बस चाहिए एक अच्छा सा camera और खिचाने वाला का अच्छा सा pose

Camera इतना अच्छा के pose करने को जी कर जाये

और खुशियाँ इतनी के आपका जी भर जाये”

 

One Plus Mobile

 

Cover Letter- I know it isn’t required but yes, I think I am creative enough to be a good fit. I hope I get a call because I have been hoping for it since long. Thank you.

AIB First Draft Writing Test I May Pass This Time- Season 2

Like last time, I will share the test with you, guys. The only difference this time is that results are not out yet.  Yes, I am positive about it.

In case, if you wish to see my test of AIB First Draft Season 1

  1. Describe a character from your own life; someone you think would make a memorable protagonist for a feature film. We are not looking essentially for shock value, uniqueness or quirks but your ability to identify and observe a character who can earn the empathy and admiration of the universal audience. We are also looking for your ability to describe a person in great detail. The more you can tell us about the person’s physical appearance, inner and social life and world-view, the better. You have only 300 words.

She is happily married now. My sister Heta has always been the ‘Apple of the Eye’ for everyone who talks to her. Although we are completely different from each other, she being nice & supportive, me being contradictory & debating in nature, we didn’t have any major issues in spending our childhood together. I admit it was possible mostly because of her forgiving & compromising way of living.

Short in height & dark in complexion, Heta is not the most beautiful girl. She knows it; she accepts it wholeheartedly. The nurture she had received in her adolescence was totally different from me. She was taught to be a ‘Nice Stereotypical Robot like Woman’ who doesn’t raise her voice in a patriarchy family and smile when men cracks even the stupidest joke.

She has a daughter now. Heta lives in the suburbs and hustle of Ahmedabad. Her dream city is quite bigger than her hometown & a small town Jetpur.

Not so beautiful as a model and not so smart to be a scientist, my sister is the most optimistic person I have ever known in my life. She ensures that what she speaks, sees & suffers is limited to her & no one should know about it.

‘My in-laws are great and gregarious. Your Jiju is adorable. The Anita aunty living beside our flat loves me. I am living my dream life. The naughty Prisha troubles me as she has just turned 1. I am learning to be a good mother, neighbor & a housewife altogether. I know I have gained weight after the delivery, it’s obvious you know. I have lost the count of days when I had opened Facebook. Bhavik, you know, Social Media wasn’t made for people like me. ’, she told me on the phone.

  1. With the above-mentioned character as your protagonist, write a story idea that explores the theme of ‘Love’. Write the outline of this story – its beginning, middle and end – with the intention to develop it into a feature film, not a short film or a play or a novel. We want to see how you set up a story, build it up and reach its resolution as well as your clarity of thought and communication. You can use a maximum of 300 Words.

Story idea: The theme revolves around the determination & struggle of not wanting the daughter Prisha to suffer in future what Heta had passed through. The only obstacle is that she can’t or won’t be a rebel here; she can only make it possible with ‘love’, abundant love.

Beginning: Like every mother, Heta is in constant hustle to nurture her daughter in the preliminary developmental stage of life so as to make Prisha fit, fine and fabulous. The mother-daughter relationship can’t be more sacred if daughter’s genes match mostly with the mother. Prisha is not Daddy’s angel but her mother’s. Slowly, Heta can notice tiny signs and attributes in her li’l one that reminds her of childhood. Safeguarding that the love doesn’t divide, Heta & her hubby Chirag always let go off the thought of having a second child.

Heta ensures that Prisha gets the access to everything she desired.  In the back of her mind, she knew she has to let her daughter fulfill the dream of whatever she wants to be.

Middle: The family of 5 (with in-laws) is devastated when Prisha soon after she turns 18, reveals that she is pregnant. It traumatizes everyone, including Heta. The ‘love’ is at the stake & its toughest test. Prisha has decided ‘not to abort’ and that has totally brainwashed Heta of what all she has expected from life. The love of Prisha for her coming child has surpassed the love towards her mother.

End: Slowly & gradually, Heta understands that even love can’t be imposed, it’s just transferred seamlessly. She supports Prisha to raise the newborn Kia. Heta realizes that this act of selfless & unhidden element of caring is ‘love’ & not every time dreams are to be searched, chased & accomplished, sometimes, dreams itself is just ‘love’.

  1. Write the opening scene of the above-mentioned movie in not more than 400 words. But the only character in this scene should be your protagonist and there should be no spoken lines or dialogue. Also, make sure that the theme of ‘Love’ is represented in this scene through visuals of some kind. We are looking for depth and variation in your character exploration, as well as vividness in your imagination. Please remember that “thoughts” cannot be communicated on film unless you find visual cues to do so.

The alarm clock rings for about 5 seconds. Heta grabs the ‘Off’ button, not the ‘Snooze’. It’s 6:00 in the morning. She, in her gown, goes into the bathroom, brushes her teeth half asleep. She peeks in the mirror to see the dark circles that has started to form. Her brush stays in her mouth for about 10 seconds without any motion. She continues it then. She takes the shower, wears a sadi, and completes the 30-mins idol worship of Lord Shiva.

The clock shows 6:45. She wakes her husband with her soft hands.

She packs the lunch tiffin in the kitchen & watches her husband getting for the office. The blurred vision from the kitchen is the usual morning glow she has been habituated to see. Always on time, she gives Chirag the tiffin & a goodbye kiss with a lovely smile.

She waves her husband from the window & stays there until she sees Chirag taking a turn on the road after which he disappears. She closes the window curtains to ascertain that the sunrays that befall directly on their bedroom don’t awake Prisha. She looks at the clock & calendar aligned side by side & a note that read “First Birthday of Prisha”. The ticking of clock reminds her of many things she has to do before Prisha wakes up. Her in-laws are sleeping and she sees it with a faint smile.

It’s already 7:30. She walks fast & goes into the kitchen to make the necessary morning setting for the in-laws. While she is busy doing the rituals, she hears Prisha crying. She goes into the room & scares the pigeon away from the window. She sees her with a huge smile & moves the cradle. Suddenly, she realizes that she forgot to turn off the gas where milk is heated. She turns it off.

She sweeps the kitchen floor & then the hall. From the kitchen window, she gazes sun rays for few seconds.

It’s 8:00. No sooner did the mother-in-law gets out of the bed, she reaches out to help her give the hand to walk through the bathroom. The mother-in-law hesitantly walks to the sofa & waits for her husband to come.

Heta prepares tea for both when the father-in-law, with his stick, goes to sofa & starts reading the newspaper.

When she hands the tea over to both, mother-in-law speaks, “………..

  1. Write a scene from the above-mentioned movie, in which your protagonist is sitting across a table with a supporting character and talking. Remember that writing spoken lines for a movie is different from a play or a novel. We are looking for your ability to write cinematic dialogue: delicious but simple conversational lines that explore character and add to the conflict of the scene. Make sure the dialogue intelligently represents the theme of ‘Love’ without being too obvious. Finish this exercise in not more than 700 words.

*Heta is in the kitchen*

*Chirag, Natvar & Sushila are sitting across a table*

*Doorbell rings*

Father-in-law (Natvar): I am going for it, Heta. You continue to make the breakfast.

*Door Opens*

Heta’s Father (Satish): shhhh

Natvar (in low voice): समधी जी।  समधन जी.

Heta’s Father (Satish): Jai Jinendra.

Natvar (in low voice): Jai Jinendra. आने में कोई तकलीफ तो नहीं हुई ना? Did you find the taxi? You should have called, Satish ji. I thought कोन हे sunday इतनी सुबह को आया हे. And look, who are at my doors?

Satish laughs: अरे बेटी के घर आने में तकलीफ केसी? The travel was relaxing.

Chirag (looks at the guests & shouts): Honey, look, who’s here to surprise you?

Heta (comes after 10 seconds & surprised): पापा ममी??? केसे हेआप? अचानक ऐसे?

Heta’s Mother (Bhavna): अरे क्यु? पसंद नहीं आया हमारा surprise?

Heta: नहीं नहीं, बहोत पसंद आया, पर पता होता तो थोड़ी तैयारी करती आपके आने की…

Father: बेटी,तुजे देख लिया उसमे सब आ गया,3 महीने हो गए थे तुजे देखे हुए. And you look beautiful with the child growing inside you, beta.

Mother-in-law (Susila): हां वो तो हे ही हे. Our neighbors recently told me that Heta’s glow has increased after her 3rd month started. हेता, जाओ चाय नास्ता ले आओ।

Heta: जी ममीजी

Satish: Don’t bring anything. बेटी, तुमको देखा पेट भर गया

Natvar: Satish ji, our breakfast is remaining. It’s good you reached on the right time. वो केहते हेना असली मज़ा सब के साथ हे. We will have it together.

*Everyone laughs*

*Heta brings snacks*

*Everyone sits, eats & talks*

Bhavna: How is your health, beta? How is your baby’s health?

Chirag: Both are good. Right, Heta?

Heta: जी

Satish: Why wouldn’t they? Chirag, समधी जी और समधन जी ध्यान ही इतना रखते होंगे, हेना बेटी?

Heta: जी पापा

Natvar: अरे शुरू कीजिए न नास्ता, satish जी.

Satish: Sure, Sure. और में पुराने ख़यालात वाला बुल्कुल नहीं हु. में तो बेटी के घर का पानी,चाय और नास्ता सब करूँगा.

*Everyone laughs*

Bhavna: Khakhra is delicious, Heta. Sushila ji, I wasn’t that lucky to get such taste in any of Heta’s cooking but after she got married, her lifestyle & especially cooking has improved so much.

Sushila: Isn’t that marriage is all about, Bhavna ji? You come to a new family, you observe different things, and you adapt to a totally new environment & set up a second innings of your life, knowing that there is no third. Aren’t we all same? But I must tell you though that Heta is a really good daughter-in-law. सब पडोसी भी कहते हे के हेता तुम्हारी बहु नहीं बेटी जेसी हे, क्यों बेटी?

Heta: जी ममीजी

Satish: Agreed, Sushila ji. Even Bhavna was same when she entered my life. Her father said that she gave up the painting hobby just for me. Was I so cute & lovable in those days, Bhavna?

*Everyone laughs*

Sushila: पता नहीं कुछ बोल नहीं रही आप आये हेतो. वरना पूरा दिन इसकी आवाज़ की गुनगुनाहट सुनाई देती हे

Chirag: Mom, you know she’s a good singer. She reached district level in her college times. She is one talented girl, adorable daughter, caring daughter-in-law & a lovely wife. Right, Heta?

*Heta smiles*

Natvar: I must also tell you that when Sushila was pregnant, everyone in my family told the same about her too. I think we have a competition here.

Chirag: You all are going to lose, Dad. Heta is the best. As far as our 2 years have passed successfully.

*Everyone laughs*

Satish: We can’t be gladder than this as parents, Chirag. It’s so blissful to see my little angel in the hands of a more caring family than us.

Natvar: अरे क्यों सर्मिन्दा कर रहे हे, satish जी. हमने हेता तो कभी बहु माना ही नहीं, वो हमारी बेटी ही हे, क्यों बेटी.

Heta (smiles) : जी पापा जी

Satish: चलिए नास्ता हो गया, बेटी को देख लिया हम चलते हे

*Satish hands a 2000 rupee note to Heta*

Natvar: इतनी जल्दी क्या हे? Heta, tell your Parents to stay.

Heta (sentimental): रुको ना पापा। मम्मी, कहिए ना पापा को.

Bhavna: You know I cannot, Heta.

  1. In not more than 400 words, narrate an incident from your life that shaped your world-view or played an important role in making you what you are today. If you have many such real-life stories, choose the one you think most deserves to be told.

I was doing my school assignments as usual when I heard the sobbing of one of my neighbors. It was not the normal crying voice that I had ever heard; it was different. When I stepped out of my room, I could see people gathered around a body & I sensed the fear of somebody’s death, someone young. Well, I was 12 & I knew no one of my age living beside my house (call it the unfortunate childhood).

Then, I saw ‘Chocolate Uncle’ coming out of that home, controlling his tears & holding his wife’s shoulders.  Sunita Aunty shouted aloud, “Ajaaaay…”.

I was terrified when the sound waves hit my ears. Ajay was studying in Standard 3 & we had met few times casually. Is he dead? I questioned repeatedly to myself until I got the glance to his body as the crowd dispersed for taking him to the funeral.

‘Oh dear God’, I gasped.

I saw my Dad in the crowd & he was sad. I had no idea why I wasn’t informed about it. Would I have grasped the fact of death at that time? Certainly not, I am pretty sure.

That day changed my whole life. Till September 7, 2003, I was living in a different ‘Happy’ world. That day I faced ‘The Reality of Life’.

I thought that human beings come to earth, live their life & pass away when they become 70 or 80. My Dad used to say that if people drink or smoke or have dangerous disease, they can die 20-30 years early. So, 50 was the minimum age a human being should live, right? Then, why did Ajay left the world when he was just 11? Was something wrong with this world? Had some imbalance occurred in God’s cycle of life & death? Will I die early too? What would happen if I die early? The question revolved around my brain continuously & I was waiting for my father to answer it all instantaneously.

I remember that my father made up some stories to console me about Ajay. It was then I gradually realized the bitterest & saddest reality that you can die anytime, anywhere. That was a lot to take for an almost 12 year kiddo & I understood it totally when my father took me the funeral of a 12 year kid when I was 18.

 Yes, like everyone, even I dream to be in AIB Team. Wish me luck!